cring brome

i am all im not. do you see that?
angry jelouse lustfull envyouse wrong disfunctional disloyal uncaring self absorbed. right now that is what im thinking but there is so much more too. so much more. i can't rely on my wits or even my own conversations because theyre are not reliable enough, just like me. so i see in otheres but what i can see in myself? what i see what i feel is only my own interpertation of certain things, dont take it too far. but i myself have nowhere to tug it too. no place to drag it along. rumagging though fine lines to ease the scrutiny that i inflict, escaping the still close bars that i locked with a glare. a stare. im shiny, then im sparkly, then im black then im muddy, pink yellow green magenta umber purple hardly ever violet. every shade of all the colors. so will i go? could i go?
of course
but will i do it
lets see

is it bring me too it? or come to me?